no shame november

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December is near, and I’m still all alone. Apologies exhaust me; the word sorry pulls at my insides and nothing is okay. Nothing is ever okay when you are not around. The trees growing in my bones are dying without you. Save me, save me, save me. Nevermind, you cannot hear my call. If you could hear my voice right now, would you even listen? Because no one ever listens. I don’t even listen. Do you feel as lonely as I do? I want to save my voice and bury it somewhere safe where no one can make it tremble like you did again. You say you still love me, and I am at awe because I would not love me if I were you. I could lie on the floor for hours and start to see your face in the corners. I tucked you away, but you somehow remain deep inside me. How can this be? You know I love you, always.

(disillusionment-charm)

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